An Alternative to Facebook
By Anonymous*
To others of my generation who still do not and cannot comprehend why Facebook even exists, here’s what I’m doing to gain a better understanding:
I’m trying to make new friends without using Facebook, but using the same principles.
Every day I walk down the street and tell passers-by what I have eaten, how I feel at the moment, what I have done the night before, what I will do later, and with whom.
I show them pictures of my family, my dog, and of me gardening, taking things apart in the garage, watering the lawn, standing in front of landmarks, driving around town, having lunch, and doing what anybody and everybody does every day.
I also listen to their conversations.
Then I give them the “thumbs up” and tell them I like them.
And…
Guess what? It’s working!
I already have four people “following” me.
Two police officers, a private investigator, and a psychiatrist.
* Mrs. Bea McCrabbie: This came to me via a friend of a friend. The earliest publication I can find on the Internet is here, but there's no particular reason to think it's original to the writer here (actually, to the writer's mother). If the "real" author contacts me, I'll certain credit her or take it down, if she wishes. At any rate, thanks to my friend & to the writer, whoever she may be.
Reader Comments (4)
I have a friend who says she's on FB because she has friends all over the world and this is the easiest way to keep in touch. Huh? how about cc via email? Nein, she says, then she'd have to read all their separate emails which takes too much time. Knowing her as I do I'd guess it's more––"Let me tell you about ME" format. I think I'll send her this very funny piece––I give it three thumbs up!
The dilemmas keep coming, this time not national or international but personal.
PD will send this delicious piece to a "friend," she says, but I would hesitate to do the same because it strikes me that a personality addicted to Facebook has already demonstrated that he or she (is there a gender breakdown here?) tends so much to the self-centered that there's not much room left for a sense of humor.
With that in mind, if I were a "friend" and sent this arch tidbit along, I'd be prepared to be "unfriended."
But then that's me. I live in constant fear.
To my "constant fear friend": My other friend, the one I sent this to, has, indeed, already come back with lengthy explanations of why she's on FB but concedes her "stuff" is not private as she had once hoped. She found it funny––but–-and the ""Buts" were of the same as before. We have a relationship that goes back decades–-there is nothing I can think of that would sully that except for me to stop listening to her––I'm a good listener and she needs to talk.
PD:
Hope you understand I wasn't 't giving advice, and I certainly wasn't making judgements about friends of others I do not know. I was merely amusing myself (my own best friend) while making a point about the relationship I detect between FB addiction and self-absorption.